It's the weekend, so I can have a little fun here, and "fun" means "fictional lawyers," right. It's been a long time since the last Great Fictional Lawyer I mentioned (Lionel Hutz), but I've found one that almost lives up to the standard set by Lionel:
Jackie Chiles.
Jackie is the apparently-solo-practitioner lawyer frequently called on by Kramer in Seinfeld, and ultimately hired to defend the four main characters in the all-too-disappointing series finale.
Education: It's not clear where Jackie got his degree from, but I suspect his undergraduate degree was in English or something similar; Jackie's vocabulary was second to none, and his delivery suggests a theater background, as well:
Credentials: Jackie has sued giant coffee companies, candy-bar heiresses, even Big Tobacco. He was asked to sue Kramer (for murder?) but declined. He specializes, it seems, in large-scale cases against multimillion dollar corporations, but never loses focus on the small details:
Notable Quotes:
On Kramer's chances in the coffee case: " Do we have a chance? You get me one coffee drinker on that jury, you gonna walk outta there a rich man. "
Negotiating on the Kramer suit against Big Tobacco, with Kramer's looks as damages:
- Mrs. Wilky: We feel that Mr. Kramer projects a rugged masculinity.
- Jackie Chiles: Rugged? The man’s a goblin.
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